Pain is the storm that strips away the frills of life. He knew everything. The anguish of my crushed hopes, devastated dreams, and unrealized expectations reached to the deepest parts of my heart.
It was in the vulnerability of this deep pain that I saw God and His sovereign sufficiency as I never had before. Every tear reminded me of my helplessness. Every suppressed sob told me I couldn't go on alone. Sifting through the scraps of my life drove me to the One who alone held the power to bring good out of the bad. I found a Friend who understood my hurt, and through pain-tinted glasses, He was even more resplendent than ever. I echoed Job's words at the end of his suffering: "My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you" (Job 42:5)
Part of the mystery of suffering is God's choice to be silent in the midst of pain. Sometimes heaven says nothing during our torrents. Cries of 'why?' or 'how long?' are often not answered. Job demanded answers from God, but his tortured words seemed to bounce off the clouds. No answers came. Even at the end of the book- God never told Job why his life was ravaged.
The Almighty is not obligated to explain His actions or allowances.
- excerpt from Living Whole Without A Better Half by Wendy Widder
To be able to see a reason for the pain is a gift. I have been given that gift, and I pray that I will not take it forgranted. To be used by my Savior, my Healer- that is my heart's cry. :)
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